Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Day Four
So, what are we on, Day Four?
So the cravings should be gone, and for the most part, I guess they are. Still wearing the patches, but the things don't stick that well and fall off randomly about the house. I'm afraid one will fall off and one of the dogs will eat it, which I'm sure would be bad for any of the random canines who live with me.
Still feel a bit snippy, wouldn't mind sucking down some sweet tobacco into my blackened lungs, but I'll pass for the moment.
Haven't been coughing as much, so that's a good thing. Zombie Rage has been replaced with a melancholy feeling of loss.
Most of my friends smoke, so I'm a little worried about being around them but the way I figure it, it is me that's quitting smoking, not them so this isn't their gig, it's mine. They can do whatever they want, but I keep wondering if I will cheat once I'm around the world of nicotine again. I can only hope I'm tougher than that.
Does that make sense?
My family is delighted, but I have to say I'm still mourning the loss of the cigarettes. Hoping that aspect goes away.
Also, It's almost like my body is cleaning itself of the nicotine. Now that is just wicked weird and is making me feel squirrelly. It's a very bizarre feeling, and I'll be damned if my sniffer is working a bit better.
Thanks for all of the support.
Going to drink excessively now, find my slinky (dammit, where is it) and continue to grieve/celebrate in the bipolar world my brain has sought fit to give me during this withdrawel period..
¶ 3/29/2006 06:50:00 AM 
So, what are we on, Day Four?
So the cravings should be gone, and for the most part, I guess they are. Still wearing the patches, but the things don't stick that well and fall off randomly about the house. I'm afraid one will fall off and one of the dogs will eat it, which I'm sure would be bad for any of the random canines who live with me.
Still feel a bit snippy, wouldn't mind sucking down some sweet tobacco into my blackened lungs, but I'll pass for the moment.
Haven't been coughing as much, so that's a good thing. Zombie Rage has been replaced with a melancholy feeling of loss.
Most of my friends smoke, so I'm a little worried about being around them but the way I figure it, it is me that's quitting smoking, not them so this isn't their gig, it's mine. They can do whatever they want, but I keep wondering if I will cheat once I'm around the world of nicotine again. I can only hope I'm tougher than that.
Does that make sense?
My family is delighted, but I have to say I'm still mourning the loss of the cigarettes. Hoping that aspect goes away.
Also, It's almost like my body is cleaning itself of the nicotine. Now that is just wicked weird and is making me feel squirrelly. It's a very bizarre feeling, and I'll be damned if my sniffer is working a bit better.
Thanks for all of the support.
Going to drink excessively now, find my slinky (dammit, where is it) and continue to grieve/celebrate in the bipolar world my brain has sought fit to give me during this withdrawel period..
¶ 3/29/2006 06:50:00 AM
Comments:
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Good show. The squirrel queen is proud of you.
It's obviously not easy or everybody would quit at the drop of a hat.
Hang in there and we'll deal with the world of smokers when we get to it.
Puffers and their evil peer pressure. You've been hanging with a rough crowd.
First it's smoking,then the next thing you know you'll be hot wiring cars and joy riding.
Then it's on to bigger crimes like bank robbery and murder.
It's obviously not easy or everybody would quit at the drop of a hat.
Hang in there and we'll deal with the world of smokers when we get to it.
Puffers and their evil peer pressure. You've been hanging with a rough crowd.
First it's smoking,then the next thing you know you'll be hot wiring cars and joy riding.
Then it's on to bigger crimes like bank robbery and murder.
With some help from a doctor, i gave up cigarettes about 4 year ago. The doc gave me a li'l nicotine inhaler, which I used to call my "nicotine nipple".
The oddest part, however, was that I noticed that while at any social gathering I felt unbalanced by the lack of a "prop" - nothing in my hands, no attitudinal stance, no ironic huff of exhaled smoke to express disdain or humor, etc etc.
About a week later I was in a bar to see a band performing and it was worse. That is until I realized I could order a cappuccino - thus armed with a large cup, a few packs of sugar, a spoon and a napkin, I then had an entire collection of "props" which allowed me and endless variety of affectations.
Yet, after all this time, I'm losing it - I started having a cigar every now and then last November. I call it filterless cheating.
The oddest part, however, was that I noticed that while at any social gathering I felt unbalanced by the lack of a "prop" - nothing in my hands, no attitudinal stance, no ironic huff of exhaled smoke to express disdain or humor, etc etc.
About a week later I was in a bar to see a band performing and it was worse. That is until I realized I could order a cappuccino - thus armed with a large cup, a few packs of sugar, a spoon and a napkin, I then had an entire collection of "props" which allowed me and endless variety of affectations.
Yet, after all this time, I'm losing it - I started having a cigar every now and then last November. I call it filterless cheating.
How the hell is this State going to fund its programs now that so many extra taxes are being hinged on you quitters!
Keep up the good work of sticking it to the man!
I wish I was able to quit and be as brave...perhaps after this pack.
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Keep up the good work of sticking it to the man!
I wish I was able to quit and be as brave...perhaps after this pack.
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